Should it be against the law?

I don't know if I'll ever get used to people wandering the streets, shouting, arguing, blaring their most intimate secrets into almost invisible telephone receivers. It's one thing when I quietly hum or sing to myself when exercising in the pool, but it's another thing when people's "silent drummer" is playing loudly in their ears and they're oblivious to everything else around.

When I bought my new cellphone, the salesman tried to sell me one of those things that hooks onto my ear.

"It doesn't have any wires. You just put the phone in your shirt pocket; you don't have to hold it."

I tried to make him take a good look at me and think hard.

"I don't wear shirts with shirt pockets!"

"Then put the phone in your pants pocket."

I don't know what that guy was on, but I don't wear pants either. He's selling in Jerusalem; there are lots of women who dress like I do. But he memorized his lines and recited like a zombie.

In order to see which "deal" to take we checked my average bill for the past few months. I'm at the top of the lowest usage. That shows that I'm not the type to be wandering around talking to myself like a psychotic off his meds. The only thing that goes in or on my ears are my three earrings! According to my kids, some day I'll need hearing aids, but I'm convinced the less I use the cellphone and the further the speaker is from my ear, the later that day will come.

There are other dangers to all these electric things in the ears, and apparently in New York, they want to make it illegal. Should there be a law?