Thursday, October 22, 2009

Super (InterGenerational) Sandwich: Not Easy

Honestly, I must admit that this isn't easy for me, taking care of my father.

I could never understand how some parents had trouble changing their lives to take care of their babies/children.  My entire life I just wanted to be a mother, so when the glorious event occurred, I accepted it with total joy.  And of course, children get older and more independent with time.  We just have to accept their decisions and love them.

Taking care of an elderly parent is totally different.  Maybe some people who grew up with their grandparents expect and accept it more easily.  But for most of us, I presume, the fact that we're suddenly tied down and know that the situation will only get worse, is quite an adjustment.  For some people, the parents move in when they're in a different stage in life and help raise and influence the grandchildren.  I've lived thousands of miles away from my parents all my married life. 

According to Jewish Law, respecting and caring for one's parents is a great Mitzvah (G-d given commandment.)  I know that I'm very privileged to have this opportunity.  Not everyone, actually very few people, have two live parents at the age of sixty.  My mother's parents both died when my mother was in her twenties.

I'm doing my best here and hope you don't mind my venting. 

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hope the venting helps :)Hang in there

Batya said...

Frayda, thanks! I was never the saintly type. I scream when something hurts or I'm annoyed.
My father is wonderfully pleasant.
I had never planned on teaching this year either. I was hoping to finally going with mky dream....

Anonymous said...

it is very difficult physically, mentally, and emotionally.
and yet, you are very lucky.
conflicting feelings are okay.

your kids may be out of the house, but what you are doing by example is great, great chinuch -- for your kids and grandkids.
do you have anyone who can spell you?

Batya said...

a, yes, thanks
Every time I go to work I have to find someone. Either my husband, one of my kids or a neighbor. My job is interfering in doing what I must do for my father.