Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Trying to Get Back on Track

As many of you know, I just got up from sitting shiva, the weeklong Jewish mourning practice, for my mother yesterday.

After getting up from shiva, which is literally how shiva ends, it was very hard to dive into the household tasks, do an inventory of the food in the fridge, freezer, closets and piled all over the place.  In all honesty, it wasn't because I was miserable, it was physical.  First of all it was a fast day yesterday, the 17th of Tammuz, and my energy levels are always very low without starting the day drinking lots of water and coffee.  I have to flush out my system.

Why was there food piled up, ok, mostly juices and soda?  I received a "shiva package" from work.  I guess it pays to be associated with a major supermarket chain.  I have to figure out what to do with the leftovers.  If I had sat all the shiva at home, much more would have gone.  My kids, neighbors and other visitors were also very generous, bringing lots of food and stuff.

Another reason, I'm having trouble doing everything is that those four long airplane trips in recent weeks sure made me feel like a cripple.  The good part about the flying was the long walks I took in the airport.

There will be a new "normal" now.

One of the very last pictures taken of me and my mother together less than a week before she died.


Jennifer in MamaLand said...

I am just so happy that you were able to fly there to be with your parents recently.
I think this is probably my mother's fear - that "something" will happen to her and I won't be there. Your story, sad as it is, is also a reminder that being together at important times is easier than ever these days.
Hope you're feeling more limber soon. The fast can't have helped either.

Batya said...

Jennifer, thank G-d I managed to visit. And the shiva, divided was good too.

M said...

Batya, I am sorry for the loss of your mother. She sounds like a remarkable lady.

I lost my grandfather unexpectedly about two months ago, and the only thing I could think was how grateful I was that I'd gotten 10, uninterrupted days alone with him in February. It wasn't supposed to happen that way, but my grandmother fell and he rushed back to be at her side. I think G-d grants us these special moments for a reason, to bless us in a time of sorrow.

May your mother's memory be for a blessing.

Batya said...

M, thanks. I'm glad you had time with your grandfather.