The 9 Days: Page 1

Shalom,
My name is Hillel Levin. I am a neighbor of Batya's here in Shiloh. Batya is taking her father, Sidney to to his new home in Arizona. If you would like to read about my parting with Sidney, check out Batya's other blog: ShilohMuse.

By way of introduction, I am a LISTER. What I mean is that I am a member of and post on over 200 Yahoo/Google Groups for Jewish Communities, Israel Action, Jewish and Zionist Groups on 6 continents.

I post for the various chessed (loving kindness) projects that I am involved in. I also receive digests from on average 100 groups per day. I admit that I do not succeed in reading them all, but I do read a broad cross-section.

Before we made Aliyah the fall of 2006, I focused in on my Tafkid, Mission in Life, that is to connect with my brothers and sisters worldwide.

I guess that one of the benefits of having the Hyper-Focus of Adult ADD is my ability to have so much stimuli coming at me all the time.

Anyway, to get to my post about The 9 Days:

This is the nine day period, from Rosh Chodesh Av until the 9th of Av. The first of the Jewish Lunar month of Av through the 9th day of Av. Today is Rosh Chodesh Av, it is in the middle of the period referred to as the 3 weeks. A period of remember-ation of the destruction of the walls of Jerusalem through the destruction of G-D's House (the Temple) on the Temple Mount.

Now G-D's House was destroyed twice. The first was the House that King Soloman Built, about 3000 years ago and it stood for about 1000 years and the second, which construction was started by Cyrus, Queen Esther's son and later re-fitted by King Herod, which was destroyed in the year 70 of the Common Era.

Two interesting things to note:

First, both of G-D's Houses were built ling before the prophet Muhammad was even a glimmer in his grandfathers' eyes. The 1st over 1600 years before, the 2nd over 600 years before. There has be at least a remnant of Jews living in the Holy Land of Israel for over 3000 years. So these facts fly in the face of any claim that Jews have stolen The Holy Land from arabs.

Second, both of G-D's Houses were destroyed on the same day of the calendar: 9 Av.

Let us look first at the reasons that are shared by the Sages of Israel that G-D's House was destroyed not once, but twice.

One learns that the House that King Soloman built was destroyed because the Nation of Israel turned away from the laws that G-D gave regarding proper behavior in the area dealing with physical relations, intimate relations.

The House that Cyrus and Herod built was destroyed because of baseless hatred among the Children of Israel.

Let us think about both of these reasons.

While I am not Paul Harvey, please look forward to Page 2.

Please leave your comments here, in addition, I would appreciate it if you would connect with me at: hillel.leib@gmail.com.

I can't sleep...

...so I'm doing my nails.

After I posted the previous post, I washed the dishes etc, tweaked the packing, then I went to bed...

but I couldn't fall asleep.  I kept thinking of all sorts of things I still have to do. 

So, I packed some herbal tea for the planes, yes, not a typo, more than one plane.    I rinsed apples and some cucumbers.

Soon it's going to be time to get up.

I don't like morning flights.

When the kids were little and we went/flew to NY, I'd pull these all-nighters to pack etc, but I packed a couple of days ago.

I can't sleep.

Just a few more hours...

I ought to do my nails.  The nail-polish is all chipped.

I have a ton of dishes to wash.

I have to burn the latest pictures onto a cd.

My father had even more guests today to wish him good luck etc and tell him how much they'll miss him.

This was his last Shabbat, because next week it'll just be a Saturday.

This little "adventure" of taking care of my father isn't over yet.  We have to fly to Arizona tomorrow morning.

Trying to Calm Down

1. Nowadays many people do all the flight arrangements online.
2. When I called British Airways, the woman said that I can do things online.
3. The British Airways site is very easy to use, and I did fix the food to kosher.
4. I shouldn't have any reason to panic over that part, even though their office won't be open until we'll already be in the air.

Almost everything is packed, including the eticket, though I have to go through my flight pouch and take out old tickets etc.  I have a special flight pouch for tickets, passports etc which I wear in addition to my usual money and camera pouches.  I end up looking like a kangaroo carrying quintuplets.

My book-supplier neighbor was over yesterday with a selection of books.  I packed two in the flight bag and two in the suitcase.  I'm sure I can get more reading material in NY from people who have books to get rid of.  I'd love that "Castle" book, written as if it's the book the TV character wrote.  But it's still a bestseller.

Of course, noshes must be packed at the last minute, or night before.  A big disadvantage of not going El Al is that you need more noshes.  I have to bring cookies for my father, because BA's won't be kosher.  The nosherie on El Al is kosher.

Only one (as two) cousin confirmed a date to meet. The rest of the NY visit will have to be planned when I'm in AZ.  Thank G-d for cellphones.  I hope my USA one will be OK.

G-d willing, in another hour and a half, I'll be in the pool.  The kids are coming today to see my father again, at least some of them.  I wonder if I should have my husband buy bourekas.  That's what I served last week for late lunch.  For many years, when they were still home or at least home for Shabbat, that was the Friday menu.  Potato bourekas with cottage cheese and big pieces of salad.

A few neighbors came over yesterday to wish my father good luck.

I've made a ridiculous amount of typos this morning.  I'm glad I have the google toolbar with spellcheck.

Pre-Flight Panic

A few days ago, I called British Airways but it didn't ask if kosher food had been ordered and the wheelchair for my father. 

Tonight I was looking at the ticket and didn't see any indications.  So I tried going online to find out.  Until I found all the codes.  Davka, there wasn't any special or kosher food ordered for me.  So I changed the order.  My father's and son's said "special," so even though I presume it's the kosher, I changed it to kosher.

My names were written crazy two as one.  My daughter who made the arrangements insisted it was OK, and I tried to call the agent she used.  Now she's angry with me.

I can't call the British Airway office tomorrow, because it's closed on Friday and Shabbat, real ducky for flights like mine on Sunday morning.

I can't wait until this is over and I'm home again and my father is happily with my mother etc.

I just realized that I never ate supper...  When I forget to eat, you know something is nuts with me.

Until The Coffee Kicked In

I woke up totally foggy-brained this morning.  Could it be because I got such little exercise and too much stress yesterday?

As we're getting  closer to departure, I'm getting more hysterical.  Taking my father to Israel was much easier.  Of course all the Nefesh b'Nefesh and Jewish Agency personnel who had to do their bureaucratic miracles in record time may not agree on that, but I find that packing up his Israeli life and getting him ready for Arizona aren't that easy. 

My daughter came yesterday to help with the actual packing and sorting through clothes to see what we really don't have to send with him.  He hasn't worn short-sleeved shirts for years, between trying to prevent more skin cancer and feeling cold, so any shirt which can't be used as an undershirt will stay here.  If my sons don't want them, we'll give them to a g'mach, one of those charity stores where people can buy clothes for very minimal prices.

About my own packing, I've done it "in my head," meaning I'm constantly mulling over what to take.  I'll probably do the basic packing today.  It's just that too many days in a suitcase isn't all that great for clothes, especially synthetics, but tomorrow will be full of pre-Shabbat and last visits by the kids.  I hope for photo-ops with my father and them.  Printing and framing I'll have to do in Arizona.  I'm the one people generally call for large family portraits.  I'll have to ask a neighbor to come by.

I still have to arrange a ride to the airport and sign up for the American Airlines frequent flyer club. 

I feel the coffee finally and it's good.  Now for my day...

Colorful Salad Recipe sans Picture

I took pictures of my easy to make colorful and absolutely delicious salad, but I don't have the time for the picture posting right now.

Ingredients:
red cabbage
a couple of carrots
some dark raisins
olive oil
lemon juice, I squeeze fresh from a lemon

1. Shred the cabbage and carrots in the food processor, or suitable grater.
2. Put in a bowl and the raisins.
3. Then pour in a bit of olive oil and lemon juice.

You can add nuts for protein and then you have a complete meal.

I Must Admit: That Was Dumb of Me

Last year, during my October visit to the states when I brought my father to Israel, I bought two new radio CDs in the Bug duty free at "natbag*."  One was missing its cord, which challenged me to demand service from a host a uncooperative clerks in various companies.  Of course, they all provided me with more phone numbers, because they "don't handle that sort of snafu."  One even told me that I shouldn't be bothering them at all:

"Why don't you just buy your own cord?  They're not all that expensive."

Last night as I was going to bed, I didn't like the program on the radio, so I decided to play around with it.  Again, OK, the previous time had been many months earlier, I opened the CD part, lifted the disk and saw something strange.  I touched it.  Funny!  It felt like paper.  It lifted out easily.  I replaced the disk, pushed and pressed all sorts of buttons and dials, because I didn't have my reading glasses on, and...

...nu?  What do you think?

*natbag is the transliterated Hebrew abbreviation for Israel's main airport.  It's use in Hebrew on all sorts of important road signs is used as a prime example of how idiotic government workers can be.By the time I opened the second box and tried to use it, I just couldn't bear to report that the CD player didn't play.  No great tragedy; I used it as a radio.

Packing Help

My daughter #1 took a day off from work and she'll be here tomorrow to help with most of the packing for my father.  Of course we'll leave clothes out to cover the rest of the week, and I'll launder everything I can.  This is getting very real.

The suitcases are down from the attic etc.

I'm tired.  I guess bedtime is here.  I need energy for tomorrow.  How will I function that long flight and then evening when my body thinks it's night?

Getting Ready for The Big Trip

I got my travel insurance yesterday, B"H, so that's done. I buy it from my sick fund.  They have a new booklet.  I just hope I don't have to use it.

I still have to sign up for the American Airlines frequent flyer group.  That's the one my agent said is best since it covers all the airlines I use.  Now that I'll have more complicated flying than just deciding between a flight to and from JFK or Newark the El Al one won't give me the service I need.  And then I'll need someone to help me learn how to get the best from them.

We're taking BA from here to Heathrow then direct to AZ.  My father will travel as handicapped with wheelchair.  I wonder if I'll then need to get to the airport all that early, since handicapped don't wait on lines.  I'll also ask my husband to find my good suitcase and pack what I can already.  I don't want to pack just hours before the trip.

Guess Where G-d Sent Me This Morning

Before leaving for Jerusalem, I blogged about wearing wild wigs, not that I wear them, not even boring conservative ones.   I have no doubt that life's a boat steered by G-d. 

Today I didn't rush out of the house.  I knew I was taking a risk, because it was after the "almost 9 bus," meaning that I had to trust that G-d would arrange a ride or two or more.  Ever since we moved to Shiloh, a few weeks short of 29 years ago, I've been working on myself to have more faith and not be so hysterical about having to be early.  "On time" was always late in my book.

Smiling and confident, I walked down to the bus stop.  I had plenty of time to meet a friend for an early lunch or snack.  Within a minute there was a ride part-way to Jerusalem.  Less than two minutes after I got out of that car, another one showed up and the driver said that he was going to Talpiyot, a Jerusalem neighborhood with great shopping.  I looked at my watch and began to calculate how much time I had and what did I really have to do.

Well, if G-d sent me a ride to Talpiyot, then obviously I had to go to Talpiyot.  Who am I to question G-d's wisdom?  As we got into the crowded maze of shopping streets there, I asked the driver to drop me off wherever it would be safe for him.  G-d forbid he should be ticketed for doing me a favor.  I found myself at the entrance to one of the small malls.  I walked in very happily, since it has some great stores including a hat shop owned by neighbors.  Of  course I visited.  G-d sent me, nu?

I was greeted with an enthusiastic hug, kiss  and scolding from my neighbor:
"Why did you stop wearing hats?"

I was wearing a cheap bright orange, cotton scarf.  She knows how much I love hats and was disappointed to see me in that awful thing.  I had taken off my faded sun hat when I entered the building.  Then of course I had to look around.  I was only interested in the wide-brimmed sun hats, crushables, of course.  I found one so reasonably priced and flattering that it seemed criminal not to buy it.

Wow! Two posts in one day about my favorite mitzvah, covering my hair!

And, yes, if you're wondering.  I ended up only a couple of minutes late to see my friend, but that's because I entered two other stores in that building, but didn't buy anything else there.

If I Were To Wear A Wig...

As a married woman who lives a Torah Jewish life, I cover my hair.  Over the years I've gone from scarves to hats-large and small- and back to scarves tied and wrapped in countless ways.  For various reasons, including a "pledge" to follow the promise my great-grandmother (whom I'm named after) made to her father, I don't wear wigs, OK except on Purim to follow the custom of "nahaphochu," doing the opposite.

L'havdil, for a totally different reason, a friend's diagnosis of cancer, I mulled with her the choice of wigs she might make if she would need chemo and if her hair was to fall out.  Suddenly it hit me!  Just like I believe that my hair-covering for the mitzvah should be fun, so should wig wearing even for medical reasons. 

Forget the conservative faux boring wigs and wear something really wild and easy to care for. 

Women's hair-covering should be the most fun of all mitzvot, because it can be so creative.  Hairdos like these can easily weather storms, right?

From what I was taught, the point of the hair-covering for a married woman is to show that she's married.  That's why some rabbis oppose the wig.  They can't tell that it's fake.  So, maybe the halachic (according to Jewish Law) solution is a fabulously, blatantly fake wig... and if you need one for medical reasons, G-d forbid, make it fun!

Am I Insane?

Here I am, just under a week before taking my father to the states, and I have a "craving" to take the plunge and change this template (and the Shiloh Musings one) to one of the new blogger ones with all the options.  I still absolutely adore the banners ~Sarah~ designed for me.  And Akiva did such a great job fixing up the templates.

I helped set up a different blog and got to understand how revolutionary and exciting all the new options could be.  I always get a kick out of the changes Risa makes on her blog, changing banners as her family, bli eyin haraa, grows.

There are now these tabs, and I wonder if I could just copy some of the long lists of posts and KCC's I have, especially on this blog, and put them on those "tabbed pages."  It's just too time consuming to copy them one by one.  I've been blogging a long time, a very long time.  There's just so much stuff I'd have to find codes for in the old template.

Maybe I am crazy.  It would be a better project when the house empties out and I'm going a bit stir crazy.  Don't be surprised if my blog suddenly looks under construction.

Eating Kosher, Much More Than Hot Dogs

Some people think that kosher is just about meat, proper slaughter, no ham nor shell fish, but that's just a drop in the kosher shopping cart.

Kosher is also the separation between meat and dairy products.  That means that anyone suffering lactose intolerance and any other problem with milk allergies can use kosher labeling as their guide to what's permitted to safely eat.  Kosher labels which say "Pareve" or "Meat" can be life-savers for those severely allergic to dairy.  And some Passover foods which are labeled as not having any wheat product are just what the doctor ordered for celiac sufferers.

Strict vegetarians can also trust kosher labeling when wanting to avoid meat, poultry, fish, including the hidden amounts sometimes included in "so called vegetarian" oils etc.

Kosher certifiers/observers were also the first to discover that animals other than tuna were in those cans.

Yes, kosher is big business, because you don't have to be Jewish to... eat kosher food.

The HH Experiment

The Rebbitzen's Husband conducts a very successful experiment with the format of this week's Havel Havelim.  Take a look and tell him what you think.

Fear of Change

Dark becomes light...
Well, I have this gorgeous picture I took, but blogger isn't cooperating again.

My parents waited too long for their move out of the house.  I don't think that either will get full enjoyment from the assisted living place.  It's very sad.

My in-laws died more suddenly, a bit younger and in better shape, so we (and my sister-in-law and her family) didn't go through what we're (including of course my sister and her family) going through now.  Also the grandchildren have better memories of my in-laws because they died with all their marbles.

This should be a lesson, a wake-up call for all of us. 

"Old age isn't for sissies" may be true, but it's worse even watching it in others.  Very sad...

The Dishes Call

Maybe I should rewrite that South Pacific song Bali Ha'i...





Why did I leave the party my kids made for may father to wash dishes on Friday?  I used to hate it when my mother-in-law would disappear into the kitchen to wash dishes during family meals, but there's no wall between my kitchen and dining-room, and Shabbat was approaching.  I dreaded the idea of starting Shabbat with a sink full of dishes.


And now Shabbat is over and the kids have all gone home, and my father went to sleep early, rather exhausted from Friday's party and then all Shabbat with his great-grandchildren and their parents.

I don't want to wake up tomorrow to a sink full of dirty dishes, so I hear them calling...

The dishes may call you,


Any night, any day,


In your heart, you'll hear it call you:


'Wash away...Wash away.'


The dishes will whisper


Every room in the house:


'Here am I, nice and dirty!


Scrub me clean, scrub me clean!'



Original Bali Ha'i

Bali Ha'i may call you,


Any night, any day,


In your heart, you'll hear it call you:


'Come away...Come away.'


Bali Ha'i will whisper


In the wind of the sea:


'Here am I, your special island!


Come to me, come to me!'

Packing Up

This coming week we'll be packing up my father's things so he can move to Arizona.  He's desperate to reunite with my mother but not at all happy about Arizona.  He really likes it here in Shiloh where the community has been so welcoming and friendly.

I'm not sending a lot of his clothes, because he gained weight here and his old pants are too tight.  Here he eats three meals and snacks, while before he came he barely ate two meals a day and fewer snacks.  Also, he's very sensitive to the cold, so it doesn't seem sensible to send him with short sleeved shirts he doesn't wear.  Yes, Arizona is hot, but it's air-conditioned, too, making it chilly.

He came with so many pairs of shoes they stopped me at customs.  I don't think the shoes are comfortable, so I won't send them back.  He'll have to get new shoes in AZ.

It's sad that he's going.  The kids are coming over before Shabbat to see him and make him an early 90th birthday.

No Real Honor

Hat tip: Shy Guy (He comments a lot on Shiloh Musings, which is how he sent me this)

Maybe this sort of thing would have once bothered me, but not any more.  I don't feel involved.  Sloppy writing, I left out the subject.

OK, starting again.

Some people may think that all religious Jews are the same, or all Orthodox Jews are the same, but they're wrong, totally.  American Jewish newspapers seem to love exposes about how various "Modern" Orthodox synagogues keep tripping over their feet trying stay on that fence between chareidi/chassidic and Conservative.  Many of the various litmus paper tests revolve around the role of women.

Im not interested in taking over "men's roles" in shul for dovening etc.    Our shul has a token woman on the committee and I served on it for a few years.  I served on it for a few years.  The men were very upset with me, because I refused to consider my main responsibility to organize and set up the "kiddushim."  At that point we had them monthly, for Shabbat Mevarchim, the Shabbat before the new month.  I wanted my opinions to count on more interesting issues.  But I discovered that all the important stuff was decided "between mincha and maariv," as the expression goes.

My sole accomplishment was to make sure the towels were always freshly laundered.  Yes, "women's work."  The men never noticed how repulsive they were.  Nu, so big deal I made an exception to my rule.  I was afraid that someone would get sick.

The woman's "seat" on the committee is no honor, more a chore.

Shabbat Shalom

Is it Really Thursday, Already?

This week has sped by.  I guess it's because I had to take my father to Jerusalem twice.  The assisted living place in AZ demands a TB test which is a two stage procedure.  First they pricked him with something and then two days letter they check to see how the skin reacts.

Of course since he's very elderly, almost 90 (August 9,) his skin is very thin and sensitive.  Also, he's on blood thinners, so he had an ugly dark blue-purple thing where he was pricked.  The nurse felt it for a rash and declared him clean, negative.  I told her that the test was for America, so she brought out an English report form in addition to the standard Hebrew.

That second trip was yesterday and it really knocked my father out.  He enjoyed looking out the car window and seeing Jerusalem.  He was also so happy to return home to Shiloh.  The flight to Arizona will be a lot longer and more exhausting.  That's why my elder son will be coming along with us.

I've already started cleaning for Shabbat, since my married daughter plans on coming with the family, and Friday afternoon the whole crew will be over to see their "grandpa."  Today I have to cook some of the side dishes besides the meat and poultry, since I'll be busy on Friday.  I  also have to launder the linens which haven't been used for months.  They've been on the beds.  I'll try to put most in the final rinse cycle to save time and water.

A neighbor will be over so I can go to the pool this morning, G-d willing.

Next week we pack and get rid of the clothes my father won't be wearing again.  Busy day and week...