How many times should we offer something after someone says "no?"
Recently at a gathering of friends, someone brought a delicious soup to give us as a treat. One friend said that she couldn't have any; she was in a rush. But the one with the soup, offered again:
"Just a little. It won't take long to eat it."
And the neighbor shrugged and took a bowl.
Another friend refused the offer, saying that she didn't eat one of the ingredients.
"So, I'll give it to you without that."
"No thanks."
"Just a taste?"
I could see my friend getting annoyed. I don't know her medical problems, but I do know that there are foods she doesn't eat. So, I quietly whispered to the friend who brought the soup that the other one is on a very restricted diet. And that was that.
Sometimes it's really hard to know if a person wants to be "urged," or "begged," or if it's really a non-negotiable issue.
2 comments:
Glad to hear about the rain! I've heard it from 3 sources by now (email from Jerusalem, Facebook friend, and your comment). I'm putting together a post on the Dead Sea for Watery Weds. Hope you'll visit.
Good topic, a friend wants someone to try, another friend doesn't want. It doesn't have to be for health reasons that someone says 'no'. When I first came to Israel, I visited a Morroccan family with one of my friends. They kept offering me food, and I didn't want any. My friend told me later I had insulted them. I had no idea that saying 'no' was a problem!
Even though it's dark, I could see that the sky is already clearing. We've just had a taste of rain, not enough to make a dent. We're not praying enough, nor being good enough. Bli neder about your post, unless you send me the link. I don't always get to check blogs. I just can't keep up.
re:food
I wish people didn't equate food with love. It's unhealthy in every sense of the word. There's nothing wrong with saying you're not in the mood to eat something. And kids should never be forced to finish, especially "because mommy worked so hard cooking."
Post a Comment